Purity is a safeguard that protects us from broken hearts and broken relationships.
How does purity protect us?
One of the ways waiting to have sex until marriage protects us is by developing self-control in our lives.
Self-control makes a person strong. It builds our internal, core strength and integrity, and tests our ability to love someone else more than ourselves.
Self-control is the window that allows us to see into the heart and soul of the one we are considering as our lifelong partner. Who wouldn’t want that?
And really, who wants to marry someone who doesn’t have self-control? Who wants to marry a weak person? If someone cannot control their sex drive, what assurance do you have that they will control their anger, their other appetites, or their ability to spend money wisely?
Self-control is worth its weight in gold. Please do not short-cut the purpose of the dating process by enjoying sex before its time. Commit to investing in your future marriage now–through purity–so that you do not have go through the pain of healing and restoring a fractured relationship that was built on a faulty foundation.
Consider the strength and self-control that we must exercise to commit to not having sex before marriage. What can it show us? If someone has a streak of weakness, selfishness, unfaithfulness, or impatience, it will clearly be exposed under the pressure of this unfulfilled longing. How do people act when what they want is not “satisfied”? Do they push? Manipulate? Coerce? Blame? Or, do they develop a lovingkindness that lifts up the other person for the greater good?
Does your mate have the ability to embrace and cultivate joy in the midst of “unfulfilled desire”? People who have a tendency to think that things revolve around them when they do not get what they want usually become frustrated and either misdirect their anger or express their unhappiness in a withholding kind of way.
These are destructive/immature traits, and if they are not dealt with before marriage, they will surely pop up in marriage.
Those who reject purity through having premarital sex, nullify this safeguard and often find themselves disillusioned once they marry.